Jason Whitlock is taking issue with Jim Calhoun's weekend press conference spat in connection with a question regarding his salary.
Jim Calhoun's "got to feed his family," too.
[Let the misplaced analogizing begin!]
Sprewell submarined the last few years of his NBA career when he foolishly claimed insult over a three-year, $27 million contract offer from the T-Wolves and uttered words that live in infamy: "I got to feed my family." Calhoun blabbered words equally as brainless on Saturday when a citizen journalist/activist slipped into Calhoun's postgame news conference and wondered how Calhoun felt about being the state's highest-paid employee when the state is going bankrupt and government employees are being terminated, laid off, pink-slipped and separated from their health insurance.
[These are two fairly different situations, right? (1) A guy responding to an *offered* amount of money, and (2) a guy responding to a query about an amount of money he *already* makes (as a result of a bilaterally negotiated contract). But, yeah, let's just pretend they are the same. It's easier that way.]
But Sprewell and Calhoun share a common characteristic.
[Ummm, that they were/are both prominent basketball figures?]
They deserted reality years ago and have a deep belief in their own importance.
[That was my next guess!]
Only arrogance and greed would make a man take the bait. Calhoun believes he's underpaid. That's why he ranted about his basketball program generating $12 million.
[Let the fist-shaking begin!]
Jim Calhoun is doing the entire state of Connecticut a gigantic favor funneling kids through the academic charade and winning basketball games for the entertainment of alumnus, boosters, faculty and students.
[I know Whitlock is being sarcastic here, but hasn't he kind of stumbled upon the kill-shot to his own tirade? For a state that is "going bankrupt," isn't Calhoun ACTUALLY doing said state a "gigantic favor" by generating $12 million dollars while only be paid about 10% of that amount?? Seems like the state would welcome that kind of return, no?]
No one wants Calhoun to refund any of his money.
[Then what's the point of this article? That Calhoun needs sensitivity training? Great scoop.]
Calhoun isn't Roger Goodell.... Goodell recently accepted a 20 percent pay cut from his $11 million salary. Does Roger feel your pain? Maybe. Maybe not. He's probably just negotiating with the NFLPA. Goodell's league is headed toward an economic showdown with its players. He'll soon be asking the players to take a lot less than what they're expecting, and he'll be able to say he's in the same boat.
[Again, something that Calhoun will NOT have to do. He's a state employee.]
Goodell is smart. Calhoun is arrogant and delusional.
[Why do I even bother reading this stuff? Where is Nils already? Stop making me read Whitlock.]
And I'm equally sure that Geno Auriemma, Connecticut's women's coach, and his peers were Calhoun's most frequent callers. The most passionate supporters of Title IX are the overpaid women's basketball coaches who play in front of volleyball crowds and get paid every two weeks as if they're filling Michigan's football Big House.
[We get it! You have a problem with coaches' salaries.]
I don't have a problem with the salaries of coaches....
[hjsdfnldfasnloeruihoanlkdmadsfljkmceo
Sorry. I just hurled my laptop out of the window. Surprisingly sturdy.]
I have a problem when coaches/athletes lose touch with reality, rub their ble$$ing in our faces and carry themselves like they're above being queried about the economic flaw in our democracy.
[Whitlock doesn't have a "problem" with coaches' salaries, he only thinks that they are an "economic flaw in our democracy."
(re-opening window...)]
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Note to NBA Players: C'mon, guys! Team owners are *only* billionaires! Let's be flexible here.
Interesting piece in the NY Times this week where Howard Beck discusses the NBA's future with super-agent David Falk. Hat-tip to The Guy Who Knows Things for passing this along. (And a finger-wag to Nils for going into witness protection.)
The N.B.A.’s system is broken, Falk says, and fixing it will require radical measures that almost guarantee a standoff in 2011, when the collective bargaining agreement expires.
[But LeBron can still be on the Knicks, right? In any event, I'm assuming that "radical measures" implies compromise on multiple fronts.]
Falk said he believed Stern, the commissioner, would push for a hard salary cap, shorter contracts, a higher age limit on incoming players, elimination of the midlevel cap exception and an overall reduction in the players’ percentage of revenue.
[Aaaaaand I would assume incorrectly.]
“The owners have the economic wherewithal to shut the thing down for two years, whatever it takes, to get a system that will work long term,” he said in an extensive interview to discuss his new book. “The players do not have the economic wherewithal to sit out one year.”
[*Two* years? Wouldn't a lot of NBA guys just go play overseas (where a lot of them are already wildly popular)? Although, this is assuming that the Euro leagues still have money.]
The players, he said, must recognize that the owners have the ultimate leverage. Many are billionaires for whom owning an N.B.A. team is merely a pricey hobby.
[Ugh.]
Unlike most of his peers, and the union leadership, Falk is an advocate of the age limit, which Stern won during collective bargaining negotiations in 2005. Falk said the limit, now 19 years old, should be raised to 20 or 21.
[That sounds totally impractical from a player representation standpoint.]
His reasons are purely practical.
[(shaking head)]
The influx of underclassmen to the N.B.A. has eroded fan familiarity and the quality of play, Falk said. An age limit will create more polished and prepared rookies, while the N.C.A.A. provides free advertising for future N.B.A. stars.
[Oh, ok. So that last sentence should have actually read that his reasons are purely practical FOR OWNERS. From a player's perspective, I am almost positive that "Making (potentially) millions of dollars" > "Providing free advertising for your future employer."]
Changes to the salary cap and the age limit sound like sacrifices from the player’s side.
[I would certainly see it that way.]
Falk does not see it that way.
[This is still super-agent David Falk, right? That is, super-agent to NBA players, right? I feel like I'm taking crazy pills!]
“The only logical way over the next 25 years that players are going to make more money is to grow the pie,” Falk said.
[Yep. Take note, Kobe. If you want to be more richly compensated two decades from now, you are going to have to make some concessions in the present day. Wait, what's that, Kobe? You say that won't be playing in the NBA 20 years from now? Well why not? You'll be in your mid-50s? Hmmmm. Hey, what's that over there!?! (scurries away)]
It seems to me that current players aren't likely to benefit (outside of potentially avoiding a work stoppage) from making the kinds of concessions noted herein by Falk. But you know who will? Well, owners, obviously. But also...... agents like David Falk who will still be representing NBA players 25 years from now, albeit new and different players. Clever, right?
The N.B.A.’s system is broken, Falk says, and fixing it will require radical measures that almost guarantee a standoff in 2011, when the collective bargaining agreement expires.
[But LeBron can still be on the Knicks, right? In any event, I'm assuming that "radical measures" implies compromise on multiple fronts.]
Falk said he believed Stern, the commissioner, would push for a hard salary cap, shorter contracts, a higher age limit on incoming players, elimination of the midlevel cap exception and an overall reduction in the players’ percentage of revenue.
[Aaaaaand I would assume incorrectly.]
“The owners have the economic wherewithal to shut the thing down for two years, whatever it takes, to get a system that will work long term,” he said in an extensive interview to discuss his new book. “The players do not have the economic wherewithal to sit out one year.”
[*Two* years? Wouldn't a lot of NBA guys just go play overseas (where a lot of them are already wildly popular)? Although, this is assuming that the Euro leagues still have money.]
The players, he said, must recognize that the owners have the ultimate leverage. Many are billionaires for whom owning an N.B.A. team is merely a pricey hobby.
[Ugh.]
Unlike most of his peers, and the union leadership, Falk is an advocate of the age limit, which Stern won during collective bargaining negotiations in 2005. Falk said the limit, now 19 years old, should be raised to 20 or 21.
[That sounds totally impractical from a player representation standpoint.]
His reasons are purely practical.
[(shaking head)]
The influx of underclassmen to the N.B.A. has eroded fan familiarity and the quality of play, Falk said. An age limit will create more polished and prepared rookies, while the N.C.A.A. provides free advertising for future N.B.A. stars.
[Oh, ok. So that last sentence should have actually read that his reasons are purely practical FOR OWNERS. From a player's perspective, I am almost positive that "Making (potentially) millions of dollars" > "Providing free advertising for your future employer."]
Changes to the salary cap and the age limit sound like sacrifices from the player’s side.
[I would certainly see it that way.]
Falk does not see it that way.
[This is still super-agent David Falk, right? That is, super-agent to NBA players, right? I feel like I'm taking crazy pills!]
“The only logical way over the next 25 years that players are going to make more money is to grow the pie,” Falk said.
[Yep. Take note, Kobe. If you want to be more richly compensated two decades from now, you are going to have to make some concessions in the present day. Wait, what's that, Kobe? You say that won't be playing in the NBA 20 years from now? Well why not? You'll be in your mid-50s? Hmmmm. Hey, what's that over there!?! (scurries away)]
It seems to me that current players aren't likely to benefit (outside of potentially avoiding a work stoppage) from making the kinds of concessions noted herein by Falk. But you know who will? Well, owners, obviously. But also...... agents like David Falk who will still be representing NBA players 25 years from now, albeit new and different players. Clever, right?
Friday, February 20, 2009
Nostalgia = Acumen
Jerry Brewer of The Seattle Times outlines the sentimental maneuvering that brought legend Ken Griffey, Jr. back to the Mariners.
Of all the touching, misty, joyful tales of this Junior Reprise, the most underrated comes from a man you've been hoping would be thrown overboard wearing a concrete life vest.
[I'm not really sure what A-Rod could have possibly had to do with this....]
For years, Mariners fans have blamed team president Chuck Armstrong, along with CEO Howard Lincoln, for their team's woes.
[Oh. Right. Sorry. I am just so accustomed to reading.... Nevermind.]
How did it happen? Go back several months, to the start of free agency. General manager Jack Zduriencik had just been hired, and after he got comfortable and started mulling plans to improve the roster, Armstrong mentioned his familial relationship with Griffey and his agent, Brian Goldberg.
[Hint, hint....]
Maybe it was his love for Griffey. Maybe he just knew him better than most. So the team president offered his assistance to Zduriencik. "Let me take the Griffey thing," Armstrong told his new GM. "Obviously, you have autonomy to do what you want here, but I'll look into this, and if you think acquiring Junior is the best baseball decision, then I will do everything I can to make it happen."
[HINT, HINT!!!]
After examining their options, Zduriencik and manager Don Wakamatsu agreed the Mariners could use Griffey's left-handed bat.
[Zduriencik's "options": (1) Keep job; (2) Lose job.]
Armstrong flew to California, where Griffey was playing in a Pebble Beach pro-am golf tournament. Griffey, his agent and Armstrong had dinner together at the Lodge at Pebble Beach that night. People kept coming over to say hello to Griffey, and Armstrong became nervous he would be spotted.
[Do you think he put on a fake Groucho Marx mustache? I bet he put on a fake Groucho Marx mustache.]
But no one recognized Armstrong as a representative of the Mariners.
[Huh? Is this guy one of the Jonas Brothers or something?]
After dinner, the three men went to Junior's hotel room to talk some more. Armstrong wiggled past an ironing board in the middle of the room.
[Umm, ok?]
"You ironed your shirt?" he said. "Yeah, I wanted to look good," Griffey replied.
[Cue over-the-top wah pedal riffs.]
It spurred conversation of how much Junior had grown in the 22 years since the Mariners drafted him.
[Crank up over-the-top wah pedal riffs. All the way to 11.]
They drifted back in time, to the first contract Griffey signed. What a long night that was.
[It's already at 11!!]
Then Atlanta started bidding against Seattle, and it seemed like the Braves would sign him.... At least the experience was cathartic for Armstrong. Griffey made him feel inspired again...
[I could keep going with this all day.]
Shortly after Armstrong's flight landed, he turned on his cellphone and received the call from Goldberg. He sounded very serious and put Griffey on the phone. "It's hard for me to tell you, but ... " Griffey said softly, pausing for effect, "I'm coming back!" When the call concluded, Mariners team physician Mitch Storey, who was on that same flight, looked at Armstrong and noticed some wetness around his eyes.
[Serious question here: Would you want *this* guy running your favorite team?]
After all the lows, Armstrong finally felt the ultimate high — pure joy.
[Can't say enough about how much I loved this article. Just amazing.]
Of all the touching, misty, joyful tales of this Junior Reprise, the most underrated comes from a man you've been hoping would be thrown overboard wearing a concrete life vest.
[I'm not really sure what A-Rod could have possibly had to do with this....]
For years, Mariners fans have blamed team president Chuck Armstrong, along with CEO Howard Lincoln, for their team's woes.
[Oh. Right. Sorry. I am just so accustomed to reading.... Nevermind.]
How did it happen? Go back several months, to the start of free agency. General manager Jack Zduriencik had just been hired, and after he got comfortable and started mulling plans to improve the roster, Armstrong mentioned his familial relationship with Griffey and his agent, Brian Goldberg.
[Hint, hint....]
Maybe it was his love for Griffey. Maybe he just knew him better than most. So the team president offered his assistance to Zduriencik. "Let me take the Griffey thing," Armstrong told his new GM. "Obviously, you have autonomy to do what you want here, but I'll look into this, and if you think acquiring Junior is the best baseball decision, then I will do everything I can to make it happen."
[HINT, HINT!!!]
After examining their options, Zduriencik and manager Don Wakamatsu agreed the Mariners could use Griffey's left-handed bat.
[Zduriencik's "options": (1) Keep job; (2) Lose job.]
Armstrong flew to California, where Griffey was playing in a Pebble Beach pro-am golf tournament. Griffey, his agent and Armstrong had dinner together at the Lodge at Pebble Beach that night. People kept coming over to say hello to Griffey, and Armstrong became nervous he would be spotted.
[Do you think he put on a fake Groucho Marx mustache? I bet he put on a fake Groucho Marx mustache.]
But no one recognized Armstrong as a representative of the Mariners.
[Huh? Is this guy one of the Jonas Brothers or something?]
After dinner, the three men went to Junior's hotel room to talk some more. Armstrong wiggled past an ironing board in the middle of the room.
[Umm, ok?]
"You ironed your shirt?" he said. "Yeah, I wanted to look good," Griffey replied.
[Cue over-the-top wah pedal riffs.]
It spurred conversation of how much Junior had grown in the 22 years since the Mariners drafted him.
[Crank up over-the-top wah pedal riffs. All the way to 11.]
They drifted back in time, to the first contract Griffey signed. What a long night that was.
[It's already at 11!!]
Then Atlanta started bidding against Seattle, and it seemed like the Braves would sign him.... At least the experience was cathartic for Armstrong. Griffey made him feel inspired again...
[I could keep going with this all day.]
Shortly after Armstrong's flight landed, he turned on his cellphone and received the call from Goldberg. He sounded very serious and put Griffey on the phone. "It's hard for me to tell you, but ... " Griffey said softly, pausing for effect, "I'm coming back!" When the call concluded, Mariners team physician Mitch Storey, who was on that same flight, looked at Armstrong and noticed some wetness around his eyes.
[Serious question here: Would you want *this* guy running your favorite team?]
After all the lows, Armstrong finally felt the ultimate high — pure joy.
[Can't say enough about how much I loved this article. Just amazing.]
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Justice. Sweet, arbitrary justice.
Nils and I have been waiting for this yawner A-Rod story to disappear before cranking it back up here at The Theorem. But, my goodness, people just WON'T stop pontificating about this. I feel compelled to mock *one* story, if only to avoid accumulating too much rust. (Deep breath) Here goes.
Rick Reilly (ugh, am I really going to do this?) wants to take the recent MVP awards and give them to their "rightful" recipients.
It's been tougher than a $4.99 steak. Got chased by Dobermans eight times. Had to hire five different sticky-fingered third-graders. Broke into the wrong house twice. But it's finally done. I've been able to retrieve every single MVP award that was wrongfully won by every single suspected 'roid ranger over the last 20 years.
[Hey, did you know that Reilly reportedly makes $3.4 MILLION per year to write stuff like this?]
[H]ere's yours from 2001, Luis Gonzalez, after you finished behind The Barry Bonds Pharmacy. We won't even mention the home run title you would've won that year.
[Well at least Reilly isn't accusing guys who saw random statistical spikes (in this case, Luis Gonzalez) but have never admitted using PEDs or been linked to usage. Maybe I was wrong about Reilly. He deserves credit for that much.]
You already have two MVPs, Albert [Pujols], and you're about to get three more, since Barry Bonds ripped you off worse than Bernie Madoff to win the award from 2002 to 2004. You hit .335 and averaged 41 bombs those years and yet you finished second behind the clearly creaming Bonds in '02 and '03 and third behind Bonds and Adrian Beltre in '04. We're throwing out Beltre since, while he denies ever using PEDs, he fell off the face of the planet once baseball put in stricter steroid suspensions in 2005. If he wasn't cheating, I'm the Queen Mother.
[Honestly, it's my own fault for even bothering to read a Reilly article. It really is.]
Rick Reilly (ugh, am I really going to do this?) wants to take the recent MVP awards and give them to their "rightful" recipients.
It's been tougher than a $4.99 steak. Got chased by Dobermans eight times. Had to hire five different sticky-fingered third-graders. Broke into the wrong house twice. But it's finally done. I've been able to retrieve every single MVP award that was wrongfully won by every single suspected 'roid ranger over the last 20 years.
[Hey, did you know that Reilly reportedly makes $3.4 MILLION per year to write stuff like this?]
[H]ere's yours from 2001, Luis Gonzalez, after you finished behind The Barry Bonds Pharmacy. We won't even mention the home run title you would've won that year.
[Well at least Reilly isn't accusing guys who saw random statistical spikes (in this case, Luis Gonzalez) but have never admitted using PEDs or been linked to usage. Maybe I was wrong about Reilly. He deserves credit for that much.]
You already have two MVPs, Albert [Pujols], and you're about to get three more, since Barry Bonds ripped you off worse than Bernie Madoff to win the award from 2002 to 2004. You hit .335 and averaged 41 bombs those years and yet you finished second behind the clearly creaming Bonds in '02 and '03 and third behind Bonds and Adrian Beltre in '04. We're throwing out Beltre since, while he denies ever using PEDs, he fell off the face of the planet once baseball put in stricter steroid suspensions in 2005. If he wasn't cheating, I'm the Queen Mother.
[Honestly, it's my own fault for even bothering to read a Reilly article. It really is.]
Friday, February 13, 2009
Revisionism, Hello Old Friend
Slow week at The Theorem largely because Nils is lazy and I am not particularly interested in the latest steroid psuedo-drama. But I couldn't pass this piece by Carl Steward entitled "Next generation must restore baseball's purity."
[Purity should definitely be in ironic air quotes, right?]
If the sanctity of Major League Baseball is to be restored, it'll be the next generation of players, not the ever-growing cast of tarnished stars, that does it.
[Restored??]
It's a ray of hope in a sad, sordid time for the game.
[Really? If *now* is a sad, sordid time for the game, what would we call the ENTIRE period before 1947?]
Desire to shake fist at the sky > Having perspective.
[Purity should definitely be in ironic air quotes, right?]
If the sanctity of Major League Baseball is to be restored, it'll be the next generation of players, not the ever-growing cast of tarnished stars, that does it.
[Restored??]
It's a ray of hope in a sad, sordid time for the game.
[Really? If *now* is a sad, sordid time for the game, what would we call the ENTIRE period before 1947?]
Desire to shake fist at the sky > Having perspective.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Sanctimony is the new black!
Ian O'Connor is on a roll.
In the real world, the Yankees would do what employers always do when they discover an employee has deceived them. They’d fire Rodriguez.
[Unless the deceit was limited to your tax return.]
The fans don’t want him. His teammates don’t want him. Even the old-timers have had their fill. “I was just across the street having a beer when all the TV kept showing was A-Rod hitting homers,” Whitey Ford said from his Florida home. “I made the owner of the place change the channel. I don’t know A-Rod, but this steroid thing is the same story over and over, and I’m sick of it.”
[This might be my favorite reaction to date. According to The Baseball Page .Com profile of Whitey Ford, they list his "Best Strength as a Player" as follows:
His willingness and ability to skirt the rules. Ford was a master at doctoring the baseball. He bragged that he could cut a baseball in more ways than any other pitcher. Ford sharpened the edges of his wedding ring and used it to cut slices in the ball, as well as the buckle on his belt. He also had his catchers, including Elston Howard, sharpen their belt buckles. One of his most famous inventions was a "gunk ball" which he loaded with a mixture of baby oil, resin, and turpentine. Several other pitchers, teammates and opponents, claim that Ford taught them how to throw the spitball and cutball.]
Good times.
In the real world, the Yankees would do what employers always do when they discover an employee has deceived them. They’d fire Rodriguez.
[Unless the deceit was limited to your tax return.]
The fans don’t want him. His teammates don’t want him. Even the old-timers have had their fill. “I was just across the street having a beer when all the TV kept showing was A-Rod hitting homers,” Whitey Ford said from his Florida home. “I made the owner of the place change the channel. I don’t know A-Rod, but this steroid thing is the same story over and over, and I’m sick of it.”
[This might be my favorite reaction to date. According to The Baseball Page .Com profile of Whitey Ford, they list his "Best Strength as a Player" as follows:
His willingness and ability to skirt the rules. Ford was a master at doctoring the baseball. He bragged that he could cut a baseball in more ways than any other pitcher. Ford sharpened the edges of his wedding ring and used it to cut slices in the ball, as well as the buckle on his belt. He also had his catchers, including Elston Howard, sharpen their belt buckles. One of his most famous inventions was a "gunk ball" which he loaded with a mixture of baby oil, resin, and turpentine. Several other pitchers, teammates and opponents, claim that Ford taught them how to throw the spitball and cutball.]
Good times.
Monday, February 9, 2009
Who is to blame for the A-Rod situation? Hank Steinbrenner. Oh, and Warren Buffett
In general, nothing gets sportswriters going like outrage; and nothing seems to create outrage quite like steroids (unless it is an NFL player). Ian O'Connor gets the ball rolling nicely.
Hank [Steinbrenner] signed off on a $305 million contract worth more than some major-league teams, a deal including $30 million in bonuses for slaying baseball’s sultans of swat. Never mind that the fan base couldn’t stand A-Rod, and that the DNA of the game’s most gifted player was so clearly missing that indefinable winner’s gene.
[Yeah, because it is smart to emphasize "indefinable winner's gene" over "the game's most gifted player" in that analysis. Maybe Cashman should have run a few gels before signing off on the new contract.]
Do Warren Buffett and the money guys at Goldman Sachs deserve a little grief from Yankees fans for bridging the troubled waters separating A-Rod and their team. Sure, why not?
[Ummm, because that's stupid?]
But Hank was the voice of the franchise at the time.
[Voice = Sole decision-maker]
As it turned out, Hank would’ve been much better off letting A-Rod sign with the Toledo Mud Hens.
[I got a guy on the other line asking about some white walls!]
There isn’t going to be a next employer; Rodriguez is too radioactive for any team to take.
[Umm, I'll take him, right?]
Hank [Steinbrenner] signed off on a $305 million contract worth more than some major-league teams, a deal including $30 million in bonuses for slaying baseball’s sultans of swat. Never mind that the fan base couldn’t stand A-Rod, and that the DNA of the game’s most gifted player was so clearly missing that indefinable winner’s gene.
[Yeah, because it is smart to emphasize "indefinable winner's gene" over "the game's most gifted player" in that analysis. Maybe Cashman should have run a few gels before signing off on the new contract.]
Do Warren Buffett and the money guys at Goldman Sachs deserve a little grief from Yankees fans for bridging the troubled waters separating A-Rod and their team. Sure, why not?
[Ummm, because that's stupid?]
But Hank was the voice of the franchise at the time.
[Voice = Sole decision-maker]
As it turned out, Hank would’ve been much better off letting A-Rod sign with the Toledo Mud Hens.
[I got a guy on the other line asking about some white walls!]
There isn’t going to be a next employer; Rodriguez is too radioactive for any team to take.
[Umm, I'll take him, right?]
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