Friday, November 14, 2008

The Mystery of Crappy Bullpens is Solved!

A quick yet enlightening take on Randy Johnson filing for free agency from Dan Bickley of the Arizona Republic.

Look, there's no doubt. Johnson pitched marvelously last season, almost miraculously.

[ERA+ of 117. Miraculous might be a touch strong, no?]

It's a shame that the bullpen did him in once again. But some of that is on Johnson.

[Huh??]

He's so famously selfish that he makes his teammates uncomfortable, and that bad karma spreads all over the field. He makes his fielders tense, his relievers nervous.

[Ohhhh, I get it! If Johnson wasn't such a dick, Brandon Lyons' 4.70 ERA would have been closer to 1.70. That makes perfect sense. And I bet Johnson had just gotten a new puppy before the 2001 season, as the bad karma seemed to be at much lower levels that year. I bet it was a golden retriever. Those things are adorable.]

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